You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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