Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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