OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
