So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
