Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
