the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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