and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize