Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
