So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
