Non-Jews are for practice
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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