Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
only if we run a train.
done.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You are a genius and a whore.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
