PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize