i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
