She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
