I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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