I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
