People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Alive.
So much puke
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Your penis caused this!
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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