Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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