No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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