Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
