Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
