have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize