Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
