u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
