I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
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