we have officially mastered the walk of shame
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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