ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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