Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
