If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
