I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
