So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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