So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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