But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
