Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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