What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
