you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
