True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
