no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize