You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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