gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
