maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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