I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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