I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
literally had 100 drinks last night.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
