is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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