Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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