I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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