Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
