Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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