been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
