I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
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